I am degenerating into sloth

I lie in bed in the mornings
Listening to the ugly squawk of beginner violin practise
Banging doors and impatient yells
The garage door opens, closes,
The noise recedes
And I stretch
Yawn
Recline like a lazy cat

And read in bed for several hours.

Sadly the books I have read
Require far too much thought for mornings
At least
Right now
So they drift in and out of my brain
Like the scent of pancakes on a Sunday morning
And eventually my stomach gets too loud even for me

So I wander downstairs and get out the chocolate.

This is what the first few days of holidays do to you.
"Don't worry" I tell myself
"You'll feel awake soon."

The days drift on
And I am still
Sleepy...

(Except, of course, when I meet up with the Melbourne Team. Nobody could feel sleepy around the Melbourne Team! It's all happening...excitement to the max. And just for the record, it is *really good* to have an almost equal girl-guy ratio. Even if it's just that I can drag people into Lush without feeling guilty!! ;) No - it's more than just that :) Fun fun fun.)

you know the morning after
when you wake up with that disgusting taste in your mouth
even though you brushed your teeth specifically to avoid said taste
and you think

'damn girl! ...that was fun...'

and the images - memories - flash through your mind
like a scene from Moulin Rouge
colourful, crazy, loud
and you get headspins just remembering it

you are still
very
very
tired...

everything seems so far away
its all...distant
like the view from the top of a ferris wheel at night
the noisy crowds
the bright lights
and up above
the stars

why is it so easy to see from there
which are really important?

maybe someday
when i'm wise and venerable
(ha.)
i will be able to see the difference
even without
the ferris wheel


ps. the band were awesome.

Q. Why is it that now that school is officially over, completely over, no more Year 11 *ever* - I'm still here?!?!
A. I have compassion for my poor parents and my theory/flute teachers, who wish to make me have more lessons because they've already paid for them...but that's ok. I wanted to play with my computer anyhow. Which brings me to my next point...

For the next two and a half months (so, until the start of February) I will be online very infrequently, and so my email will be slightly less reliable. (As in, I'll check it every three or four days as opposed to two or three times a day.) And I probably won't be on icq much either. This is cause the internet is locked at home, by the evil parent trolls, and i'm supposed to have a good reason to access. Like homework. And as it's now the holidays, and I'm not going to be able to access at school either, I'm going to have to find other ways of wasting *ahem* I mean *spending* time.

This is probably of little interest to most people. Sorry. But you've got it in your brain cells now so you're stuck with it :P !

Things of slightly more interest...

I played with the orchestra last night, and to my surprise, really enjoyed it. Grade 8 Flute pieces coming up :D :D :D It's all good...

The first two weeks of January (it's not that far away people! trust me!) I'm going to beautiful scenic Tasmania... nice. very nice. For those of you who have no idea where Tasmania is, it's under Victoria. Big chunky island. Although not as big as the main body of Australia. (And yes, this is pretty much the extent of my geographical knowledge ;) ) And it is excessively beautiful and scenic and perfect for bushwalking and swimming and sunny days and fresh air and all that stuff. And I think I might get to travel in a hovercraft...sounds cool...

On another note, I've been reading Lord of the Rings in preparation for the movie, which looks INCREDIBLE. I can't wait. The casting is inspirational...and Cate Blanchett is so cool. (she went to my school. like, twenty years ago. anyway...) So I'm planning to finish that before boxing day, when the movie comes out, even if I spend all of Christmas day reading!! (Although I probably won't. I'm already halfway through...)It's heavy going, but *beautifully* written. ("Well, duh" say all the people who've already read it - hang in there! I'm reading it for the first time!!)

Speaking of amazing movies, if any of you overseas people get the opportunity to see Lantana - see it!! It's brilliant filmcraft...ensemble acting at its best...I was blown away. And I think it's coming out over there soon. Or now. Not sure.

Oh - shoutout - has anyone read any good novels set in Italy during the time of the Renaissance?? Could you comment?? Cause I really need to get into it before the start of my Renaissance Italy History course in February. It looks like a great course, actually...I went to orientation the other day and our text book looks like a coffee table book - all beautiful colour pictures and it's *big*. :D :D Can't wait...

Actually, all of my classes sound awesome. (History, Politics, English, English Literature and Uni Lit.) Believe it or not, I'm looking forward to my holiday work!

PS. Does anyone know what a hovercraft *IS*?!? :P ;)

opshopping
old raggy laidback relaxed clothing
lived-in
like fluffy slippers
but not so stinky.

party
alcohol provided (by host)
scandal provided (by me - and a few friends...)
sunday night
through monday morning
it should be...interesting...
and i have hopes that the live band will be good.

flute practise
vivaldi
concerto
another challenge
but this one is of my choosing
sortof.

possible tig meeting
i'm up for it :D

now that exams are over
i may return
to real life
at least, i think it is...

So, here's the catchup!

Exams are OVER!!! (Until next year. But who cares about that right now, I'm living in the moment! :) )
It's all good. Jose, I'm sorry to say that I only answered about ten marks worth of questions in the final physics exam. But I had fun doing it!! It was a worthwhile time...I spent most of it doing mental arithmetic (almost burst out laughing when I realised I'd forgotten my calculator - no kidding!) and writing lists of CDs I want to buy. ;) More fun than most of my exams. I took all of the others seriously tho, so I'm guessing that's why. Pretty sure I passed all of the rest. No more Chemistry - EVER! That was exciting...and kinda sad. (But mostly not at all sad. Just to clarify.)

History exam was really really scary. Wasn't helped by the fact that I spent the five days beforehand studying my butt off, and still didn't know everything. I knew I couldn't know everything, but that doesn't make the nervousness go away. (NB - How come I can stand up and sing in front of 800 people, and it doesn't make me as scared as writing an essay? Bizarre... I think really it's all about consequences...) And the ambience within the exam room wasn't helped by the fact that one of my classmates - and friends - bolted from the room five minutes into reading time and threw up in the corridor...

It wasn't a particularly enjoyable or successful exam, I hate to say. But I hold out hope that I will have done ok. 31 days until I find out...

I got a B+ for my flute exam. Not as good as I was hoping, but I was so happy with the standard I reached - and how much I enjoyed it - that I don't really care. (My teacher also reassured me that the examiner was a ridiculously hard marker, so that was good too.) And now I'm resolved to do eighth grade - and play in the school orchestra - next year. Which reminds me, I should do some practise...:)

As for the holidays...
I am currently basking in the bliss of the prospect of two and a half months of sheer, pure freedom...
It's an exceptionally good feeling.
Although my only 'holiday' holiday plans are a 2-week jaunt to Tasmania at the beginning of January with my willing accomplices...*ahem* I mean family...I have many plans regardless. My art, my babysitting clientele, my music, my writing&composing gig for next may, my zine, my dancing - oh and my shopping trips! - have all been taken out of the storage closet where they have been lying, dusty and lonely, waiting for school to be over.
Take it from me, none of them will be lonely for long :)

I'm planning long trips to the Botanical Gardens on sunny days, balmy nights spent strolling along the beach, and other extreme-fun summer stuff...It shalt rock, bigtime. I think I almost like the prospect better than I'll like the actuality. Then again...nah!

I keep thinking 'I should really update, I should really update', so I finally got around to it...and don't know where to start with all the stuff you guys have been missing out on! So I'm back to good old dot points. Hooray.

- didn't make it with Guys and Dolls. Almost did. I was their second preference. I look to Tuesdays with Morrie in my time of grief and say to myself "What's wrong with number 2?"! :) So yeah...it's ok. I have many other things to do next year.

- Exams are, so far, going ok. Got the big one on Wednesday...History...I have two days (almost) and have been breathing eating sleeping France and China...tho not as much as I should've been. So I'm keeping this short, to get back to it!

- Flute exam went *really* well, for once. It was fantastic...so I have high hopes. Should find out in two weeks or so.

- Went and saw lantana today. It was interesting. I have great respect for every actor in it...truly powerful performances.

- also saw short for The Others. I know everyone overseas has already seen it, but bear with us down under being later with the movies, ok? That being said...Nic is veeery good. I can already tell ;) And I will go and see it. Soon. After exams.

Not much else to say. I'm trying to be focussed on exams, but worried that afterwards, there'll be this big black hole where all that focus used to go...and then I'll be creative and fill it :)

Those people who whinge about Melbourne weather obviously have never lived here for any period of time. I love it.
Although you can never tell what the weather's going to be like (you can take a relatively good guess mostly though) when it's beautiful weather, it's REALLY beautiful. Like today...
It's so nice that I decided to a) stay in bed all morning eating breakfast and reading and b) when I got up, get dressed in SUMMER clothes!! This always makes me happy. No matter what. But the weather has to match for some reason...not because I'd get cold, just because it would be wrong to wear halter tops and little skirts if the sun wasn't shining.

Anyhow...in the way of news...
~ Audition was great. I'll keep you posted!
~ Three days til my flute exam. And I still don't know my scales in thirds! Augh! Must practise more, must practise more...
~ Ditto History...especially of China...
~ I am going shopping this afternoon. I may go to Lush. Or possibly Sanity, and buy a CD for the first time in about three years. (I steal my parents' CDs. Don't worry, I'm not at all musically deprived.) Or I may go and buy a book. I just feel the need to treat myself! And hey - I survived the last month, I think I deserve it. I have nothing - NOTHING - left to hand in! It's fantastic!! You have no idea...(or maybe you do. i can't tell from here ;)
~ Oh! Something of probably absolutely no interest or relevance to anybody reading this (what a nice change, they say :P ) but of great and deep importance to me - I recently rediscovered two of my absolute alltime favourite pairs of earrings! One pair are Venetian glass beads, and the other are silver swirls/spirals. They're beautiful, and I was seriously struggling without them - long dangly earrings are awesome. So that was extremely exciting. ;)

***Disclaimer: Those who have never met me in person may be unaware of my unusual sense of humour, and as such confused as to the tone of my last comment. Or maybe the whole thing. Who knows. In reality, I am aware of the lack of importance of my earrings, but I love them, and ... yep. That's all I was going to say.***

Scary. Very scary.
Soon. Very soon.
Feeling stupid. Very stupid!
And worried.
And tired.
Although the fact that this is my last day of school makes up for all of it.

I have my audition today as well...
Wish me luck!